My Journey Through India Part 1

Hey’ y’all, I’m back once again with the flavour! Bringing you that knowledge on India that nobody ever gave ya!


So I travelled throughout India for about 2 months and 1 week. I never made it up to the north, there is just too much to see in the south. The north, from what I hear, is a very different experience from the south. In the south, people are way more laid back and it’s more tropical down there, with many beaches scattered all the way up the south west coast. Loads of amazing spots to see! Whereas the north seems more intense and maybe not quite so laid back and relaxed. But I can’t vouch for that as I haven’t been. That is one place that is to be experienced in my future for sure.

In my first post I left off after I arrived in Varkala (it’s a trap!), which was really only just at the start of my journey. In this post I will continue my journey, list the places that I went and maybe it will inspire you to visit. I’ll post up pictures too so you can see what each place is like! If you have never been to India, the picture in your head will most likely be of crowded places, dirty streets and chaos, but the south is not always like this. I went to many picturesque and beautiful spots where there weren’t many people at all, and then I did of course also go to some of the more chaotic cities as well.

I am guessing that if you are looking for a relaxing holiday destination, India isn’t one that would pop up in your mind. But why not? You lot don’t know nuffin’ (it tried to auto-correct this to ‘muffin’…I’m hungry, yuummmm muffins *drool*)! And maybe you don’t know muffins either? But let’s not go there, I’m not one to test one’s muffin knowledge…I’m hardly an expert myself! Having said this, in Perth at the airport I had the most amazing muffin I have ever had in my life. It was massive! And warm as well. Damn, I wish I had a muffin right now. I’ll see if I can find a picture of it. Actually, hang on a moment I just have to Google some pictures of muffins for five minutes………*tick tock*…….ok I’m back. These ones look pretty good don’t they:



What was the point of this blog post again? I might just scrap it and go make some muffins. No, no I better finish it first. Ok, so it was about my top ten muffins in India right or something like that? God, I can’t even remember. If you’re still reading this I feel sorry for you….this post could probably take quite a while to get through!

OK, back on topic for real now…muffins. Right? What is your favourite type of muffin? I personally like blueberry. I love blueberries! Blueberry and white chocolate sounds good too! And heated up so the chocolate is melting…yuummmmmmm…. *ahem*

Ok, so India.

Let’s do this!

Come on Patrick. Focus!

So as I was saying, India can prove to be a very relaxing holiday destination after all. There are many nice spots up the south west coast, which is where I spent most of my time. So let’s start with Varkala as that’s where I got to last time.


This is in Kerala, which many say is the most beautiful (and green) part of India. It is basically a cliff with loads of shops/stalls/shacks that sell stuff, plus restaurants, etc. It is quite touristy. We kept calling it ‘our holiday from India, in India’, if that makes sense. You can figure it out. You’re smart people. Below the cliffs are beaches and it’s also a pretty decent spot for doing a bit of surfing as well! Surfing in India, who’d have thunk it?! I stayed here twice on my trip. The second time I stayed there had been a murder on the cliff after some local Indians had a dispute with a restaurant owner and his son. The suspects ended up fleeing, and for all I know could still be on the run as fugitives. About a week later, someone tried to burn down this same restaurant/guest house and the fire started to spread down the cliff, destroying shops. And also, some young shop owner apparently died during the night a few weeks before this. So, all in all, a perfect destination for a relaxing break! Hahaha….next…

But honestly… aside from all of this madness, this place is super chilled out. In total I spent over three weeks here basically doing not much. I cursed myself a little for ‘wasting’ time not seeing other parts of India but hey, I was enjoying myself and that’s the most important thing right? This is why I say it’s a trap! It is easy to get stuck here. All of the food is super cheap and pretty good quality. Fish is brought in fresh every single day by the fishermen. I had the most amazing fish I have ever had here, a swordfish fillet. It was huge! And I had it with rice and vegetables and it all came to like £3 or something. Bargain. Normally I would consider £3 a lot for a meal but that was truly first class. Just don’t tell any of the restaurant owners that the fish once had a mother as you may get into a really awkward, weird argument. Moving swiftly on…

Oh and also whilst here we saw a moondog, or moon halo which was pretty amazing. What is that you may ask? Well it is a relatively rare bright circular spot on a lunar halo caused by the refraction of moonlight by hexagonal-plate-shaped ice crystals in cirrus or cirrostratus clouds. Moondogs appear at 22° to the left and right of the moon. They are exactly analogous to sun dogs, but are rarer because to be produced the moon must be bright and therefore full or nearly full. Moondogs show little color to the unaided eye because their light is not bright enough to activate the cone cells of humans’ eyes. You got that? Good. Thought I’d keep it nice and simple for you.

Here are a few photos from Varkala…


A Hindu shrine (if that’s the right word?) in a shop.


This was probably the best thing about this shop. After we finished playing with this puppy, he went over and took a pee on the entrance doormat to the shop. We clearly got him too excited.

IMG_4096 IMG_4100

Now that’s a face only a mother could love! (no disrespect to any Hindus out there)… This is the monkey God known as Hanuman. I have no idea why I bought this, ummm, tea towel….? I think actually you are meant to hang it on your wall like a painting. I think that I was bribed into buying something from a shop because I took a photo. It probably only cost like 20p anyway.


Kiya on a train again from Varkala to Om Beach. He just loves being photographed on trains this guy. Haha.










It was extremely hot at this point. I was in for a lot of sweating that day. Honestly, I don’t know how my body can produce so much sweat sometimes. Maybe it’s like a superpower that I need to learn to harness in some way…? I think one day I will do a post on my top 10 most sweaty moments in Asia…huh? What do you mean that’s the worst idea you’ve ever heard? It’s totally original and well, just basically brilliant! Like me!

So that last photo shows Léna and Kiya just after we got off the train from Varkala to Gokarna, where we would head to the next destination known as…

Om Beach

This is just near Gokarna town. Om Beach is really nice. This is the same place that I got that tattoo from that guy in that shack on the beach that could have potentially given me some kind of disease. But you know…YOLO! (did I just say that?) …It makes me wonder, who comes up with these sayings and how do they spread? I’m guessing they start in internet forums and then are somehow spread and adopted by the coolest of the cool, unaware that they were invented by that same person that they bully at school…who’s the cool one now eh!? So I YOLO’d it all the way to the tattoo ‘studio’ in Om Beach and got a tattoo of an ‘Om’. Which is a Hindu symbol that you see EVERYWHERE in India. To be honest, I don’t really understand it and I’ve read up on it loads. It’s just too complicated. Hey, don’t judge me. I only did it cos I thought it might make me look cool, like one of those travellers that is totally in touch with the culture and is totally at one with mind, body and soul. Yep, that’s me now. I am well spiritual. Whatever that means.

God this post is taking far too long and all I can think of is muffins. Does it show? It’s probably well boring to read. Maybe I should write about muffins next time? I am highly addicted to sweet things. LOOOVE my fro-yo, and gelato ice cream as well! I am surprised that I’m not double the weight I am now. I put it down to all of the running that I do, often to the muffin shop.

So anyway, whilst at Om Beach, one of the most amazing things that you can do at night time is to see the glow in the dark plankton. Or bio-luminescent plankton as they are known. They are tiny creatures in the water that glow up when disturbed. So when you swim with them, it is like you are in a Disney film with tiny crystals of light all around you. It is pretty magical. I saw this twice in my travels. Once in Om Beach, here and once in Cambodia on Koh Rong. It was actually much better and the plankton were brighter in Koh Rong, but I didn’t get robbed whilst I was in the water in Om Beach so that was probably the better experience on the whole!

Another amazing thing to do here is to get a boat (or you can walk as well) to a beach a few bays over called Paradise Beach. This was once populated with guesthouses but I think the police shut it down for one reason or another so it is now completely empty. We were there for a few hours, wandered through the bush behind the beach and went swimming (with our new tattoos held high out of the water!). Now because we (three of us) were now tattoo’d with the Om symbol and were clearly at one with our inner spirits, we decided to do some yoga on the beach. We were clearly qualified now. It didn’t really go too well and we got the boat back to Om Beach. The end.

Can I get my muffins now? No I will carry on, there is still much to tell. One day we got a tuktuk into Gokarna town and I had some of the best food that I had in all of my journey throughout India. I had a delicious cashew nut curry and also some fried cauliflower (gobi manchuri). We were there for sunset and the whole town turned golden as the sun was setting, it was rather incredible. I have never experienced such a reddish, golden glow that seemed to just hang in the atmosphere around us, like were we inside a blanket of soothing light. That’s the best way I can describe it. I wasn’t on drugs, I promise.


Look, the cows are on holiday again. This time a bird with a stick in its beak has joined them. Joy!

So I will continue this journey next time… 1) because I could be here forever chatting about the random times I had, 2) there is no way I can cover all of my trip in India in the rest of this blog post, 3) you’re probably really bored now and 4) I want my muffin. In fact, let’s just remind ourselves why we are reading this post at all…

muffins 3

This time I Googled “delicious muffins” in case you are interested. On the whole, the search results were a little disappointing, but I still found these tasty looking treats. If you would like further tips on keyword combinations to search for your desired muffin of choice, please shoot me an email any time.

Is anyone else hungry right now? I wonder why… So next time I will continue my story from Kollur/Kodachadri, the place in India where they make you get undressed to enter temples and where you have to convince people that you are not on a suicide mission if you want a place to stay for the night. I hope that this blog post has been informative and educational because after all, that’s why you’re here isn’t it? To learn? Well I think we’ve all learnt valuable lessons about life today. I have probably missed my calling in life as a teacher. I am always focused and I never get distrac…..ok that’s enough shite for today!

Muffin out…

Sorry, I mean:

Patrick muffin…

No that’s not right.


Yeah close enough.

muffin 4

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